


Farewell letter

by Jukah



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Army, F/F, Farewell letter, Feels, Lexa goes to war, Sad, Soldier Life, happiness, last letter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-11
Updated: 2015-08-11
Packaged: 2018-04-14 03:44:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 522
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4548981
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jukah/pseuds/Jukah
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clexa Modern AU OS : Lexa's farewell letter to Clarke when she leaves to go to war</p>
            </blockquote>





	Farewell letter

Dear Clarke,

 

I don’t know if I’ll be able to come back this time. We both know how unpredictable life can be sometimes… I’m still hoping that living with you until we’re both old ladies, bitching together, is not just a dream – stupid dream, right ?  
Day after day I become less scared of the future ; of the unknown. I mean I’d never thought this would happen – you know what I’m talking about, right Blondie? (Yes, I’m talking about you ; of course, I sort of love you, y’know). I never thought my “ tough, idiotic, sassy ass ” - as you call it sometimes – would still be there amongst the living, and for about 30 years now. And I do believe that’s because of you, Clarke…

The truth is you kinda saved me. You saved me from the fucked up life I had before I met you. You know why I joined the army. You know what I had to lose – nothing. And you know how deeply I buried my feelings before you found me. But this letter is becoming way too emotional. We both know how “ tough, idiotic and sassy ” I usually am, right ? So I’m not gonna repeat how much I owe you and how many years of happiness I have been living thanks to you, because I think you know. What a cute burden of joy and hope you are. 

Right now I’m writing this as you are in the shower – stop singing that silly song so loud, by the way – and I’m just feeling so content. Everything is always so great with you, even when we argue and you won’t admit that I’m right, even when you have a hard time with your mom but try to hide it, even when everything goes bad and you refuse to let go – because you’re still there. You are right, forgiving, sweet, and you never give up. So go on singing your One Direction songs, you pigheaded thing. I’ll never admit it, but I love it when you sing because it tells me that you’re happy. And that makes me happy too. Because I have you. May I say that? Can I say that I have you? I know I don’t own you, it’s just… You’re here and I’m so grateful for that. I’ve always been afraid of losing you, but now… I know that you’re here, with me, and that’s all that matters.

I’m writing this before leaving you for this stupid war I’m going to. I don’t want to do this whole farewell thing because, first, I may come back – I will do everything within my power to do so, trust me – and because I don’t think it’s necessary. I just needed to try and write how safe and in love I feel now. My life is all about you, Clarke, and if I disappear, my only regret won’t ever be about dying, instead it will be only about losing you.

 

But at the moment you’re here, coming out of the bathroom and – gosh – half naked. You’re here, with me, and that’s all that matters.

I love you, Princess, 

Forever your commander,

 

Lexa


End file.
